


Never Have I Ever

by sapphicwave



Category: Voltron: Legendary Defender
Genre: Hurt/Comfort, M/M, Post Season 6, Referenced Alcohol, the whole team is there but im not tagging them all lmao, theyre playing never have i ever cmon
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-08-07
Updated: 2018-08-07
Packaged: 2019-06-23 12:58:55
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,185
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15606810
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/sapphicwave/pseuds/sapphicwave
Summary: “Keith, your turn.”He hums for a moment in thought before straightening up and laughing to himself and looking across the circle at Shiro.“Never have I ever died.”





	Never Have I Ever

**Author's Note:**

> I saw this post --> http://fivtoo.tumblr.com/post/176704438043/ever-think-about-the-fact-that-lance-straight-up  
> and i felt very compelled to write an entire fic about it. Maybe this is just me venting through fic about the fact that Keith and Lance will not. stop. sacrificing. themselves. But that's besides the point.
> 
> I hope y'all enjoy!!

“Never have I ever… thrown up in public.” Hunk groans and takes a sip of the odd alien beverage sloshing around the bottle in his hand.

“We said no targeting Lance, c’mon.” Lance simply giggles, looking around the circle to see if anyone else took a drink. He shrugs.

“Oops.” It was Lance’s idea that they play ‘Never Have I Ever’. Pidge quickly agreed, adding that they might as well have some fun, even if the planet they were resting on contained nothing but a bunch of rocks. After a quick explanation of the game everyone was on board, Coran proudly brandishing the bottles of what everyone assumed was some kind of alien alcohol. Even Romelle and Krolia seemed interested, the tediousness of their travels to Earth obviously leaving even them in desperate need of some fun. 

They sat in a circle, all gathered in the cargo deck of the black lion. They were fairly deep into the game by this point, and the paladins were not faring well. Krolia was surprisingly crushing it, knowing enough about life on Earth to know what all the paladins have presumably done without having actually done it herself. Turns out living on Earth for a few years gave her an upper hand in more than just being a spy. Lance could not recall ever having to take a drink for something as simple as owning a television or eating a mango. Although he did feel smug when he pulled ‘never have I ever flown a galra ship’ on her.

“Okay okay” Lance says, nudging the boy next to him, “Keith, your turn.” Keith is apparently a lightweight. He was currently leaning on Hunks arm, flushed face lit by the soft purple lighting of the lion. He hums for a moment in thought before straightening up and laughing to himself and looking across the circle at Shiro.

“Never have I ever _died._ ” Shiro laughs and raises his bottle in a weird sort of toast before tipping it back and taking a gulp. Everyone lets out an uncomfortable laugh while Hunk mumbles to himself about ‘seriously what ever happened to no targeting?’. Keith chuckles, proud of himself for thinking of a way to get back at Shiro for saying ‘never have I ever crashed my motorcycle’. He goes to rest his head back on Hunks sturdy arm when he sees Lance taking a few gulps from his bottle as well. “What the _fuck_ ?” he asks, whipping his head to face Lance, mind suddenly feeling less clouded than before. “You _died_?” Lance finishes his third gulp of the drink before nodding, easy expression feeling very inappropriate for the question he was answering.

“Shit, I totally forgot about that.” Hunk mumbles, shifting his weight to lean forward.

“You’re serious?” Keith asks again, brows pulled up in a look of concern Lance wasn’t used to seeing.

“It’s true, he sacrificed himself to save me when we were helping a Galra outpost.” Allura chimes in. She looks around the circle and smiles weakly before looking down at her hands uncomfortably. The air in the room grew heavy as a silence fell over them, Keith still staring intently at Lance.

“It’s not a big deal. Allura used her magic on me and I was fine. All good.” Lance takes another gulp of his drink and leans back on a crate behind him, letting his head fall back to look at the ceiling.

“You died Lance, that _is_ a big deal. Why didn’t you tell me?”

“I didn’t think about it?” He pauses. “Why didn’t you tell us about when _you_ almost sacrificed yourself?” Everyone in the room collectively tenses, the air around them feeling impossibly heavier. Krolia stares at Keith with something indistinguishable flickering over her face. Keith’s expression falls briefly. He shakes his head and looks back at Lance with a glare.

“I didn’t follow through. You did. And you died.” He says through gritted teeth. Lance removes his eyes from the ceiling and looks directly at Keith.

“You would’ve gone through with it if you could’ve. Allura wouldn’t of been able to save you. You only stopped because Lotor saved our asses.” He tears his eyes away from Keith’s and goes back to staring at the ceiling. “Saved by the fucking bell” He mumbles.  

“Al-right then. I think it’s getting too late don’t you think?” Coran says, clapping his hands as he stands up. “We should be resting up, we have a long haul ahead of us, hm?” Everyone quickly murmurs in agreement, getting to their feet and making their way out of the lion. Keith and Lance remain on the floor, both glaring at a fixed spot in the lion. Coran looks at them briefly before shaking his head and sighing. “We’ll be down at the campsite. Don’t be too long.” He hesitates for a moment before making his way towards the exit. Krolia follows behind him, looking back at Keith and biting her tongue. Coran looks over at her puts a hand on her shoulder. “You can talk to him later. They need this.” She looks at him with an unreadable expression and nods, taking one last look at her son’s tiny form sitting on the ground before leaving.

The two boys sit in silence for a long time, neither of them wanting to be the first to speak. Lance could’ve left with the others. He could’ve. But he didn’t. Lance couldn’t understand why. He didn’t want to talk to Keith about this. It was stupid. They both did the same thing. Keith tries to sacrifice himself all the time. He doesn’t have any room to talk. He lifts his head and sneaks a glance over at the pouting boy next to him. He groans internally and lets his head fall back again.

Keith felt like he was going to explode. Lance _died_ . He died and Keith was the only one who didn’t know. He couldn’t believe that Lance was treating it as if it was no big deal. As if team voltron wouldn’t fall apart at the seams without him. As if _Keith_ wouldn’t fall apart without him. He shook his head. Scratch that last part. Nope. We aren’t going there tonight. His head felt like it was going to fall off his shoulders, and honestly all he wanted to do was curl back up against Hunks grounding presence. He was beginning to think whatever was in those bottles was just expired nunville. Maybe it was the mystery beverage clouding his judgment, but as Keith looks over at Lance’s tense figure he suddenly feels compelled to be the first to speak.

“Please,” he croaks out. His voice feels raw. “Can we talk about this like adults.” Lance let his breath hiss out slowly through his gritted teeth.

“No.”

“You’re serious?” Keith asks exasperatedly.  

“Dead serious.” Keith hates that he can see a smirk forming on the other boys lips.

“Fuck you. It’s not funny. You died.” Lance whips his head to face Keith. 

“You were going to kill yourself. I had to find out through _Matt_ .” Lance almost hisses. “You go on suicidal missions left and right, Keith. We didn’t hear from you for _months_ at a time.” Keith’s eyes are impossibly wide. He flounders for a moment.

“You jumped in front of a bomb for Coran after knowing him for a week. You have no room to talk, Lance.”

“It’s not a competition!” Lance yells. Keith feels himself recoil. “It’s war. People die. That’s how it _works_!” Lance’s breathing is heavy. Their eyes are locked. Keith feels as if his brain is frozen, his mouth unable to move. He feels like his heart is breaking. It feels like an eternity.

“That doesn’t mean you have to throw yourself at every sign of danger.” Keith says quietly. “You don’t have to die to prove you’re a hero.”

“Says the black paladin.” He can almost hear Lance’s voice crumbling. Lance lowers his eyes and crosses his arms, caving in on himself as much as his long limbs will allow him.

“Lance,” Keith says, voice suddenly drenched in sorrow. “Lance.” He says again, somehow softer. He can’t find it in himself to say anything else. He wants nothing more in this moment than to take the broken form in front of him into his arms and never let go.

“Don’t ‘ _Lance’_ me,” he spits, “you know exactly what I mean. You have two lions ready to save your life at any moment. You have the Blades. I have a hand-me-down lion that still doesn’t feel like my own. I don’t belong here Keith. You know that. We all do. I might as well die in a blaze of glory before Red kicks me out too.”  

“Don’t say that.”

“It’s the truth, Keith.”

“Shut up.” His voice cracks. “Lance seriously shut up. Do you know how important you are to this team?”

“Please enlighten me” He scoffs. Keith sucks in a deep breath.

“Do you know how important you are to me?” He barely whispers. Lance looks up, his hard expression softening. “You hold us together, Lance. You are our heart. If you were gone, I don’t know what we— I don’t know what _I_ would do.” Lance looks at him, his eyes searching.

“You spent months, years, away from me. You did just fine.” He says quietly, voice raw. Keith flinches, as if the words physically wound him. He breathes deeply through his nose.  

“I wasn’t fine.” He pauses, searching Lance’s eyes for the confidence to continue. “You mean so much to me, Lance. I’m sick of pretending you don’t.”

“Then why did you leave?” Lance’s voice sounds broken, like a distortion of the chipper tune he fell in love with. Keith breaks his eyes away from the deep blue of Lance’s, searching for an answer. 

“I don’t know.” He really doesn’t. His head is spinning. He’s not sure if it’s from the old nunville. “I’m sorry.” He croaks. “I’m so sorry.” His eyes sting, his vision blurring with hot tears threatening to spill as a lump in his throat turns the rest of his words into a strangled noise. He feels two arms wrap around his neck, pulling him forward. His face lands in the crook of Lance’s neck, nuzzling closer as the arms pull him tighter. “I’m sorry I left. I’m sorry I didn’t tell you. I’m sorry. I’m sorry.” He tries to say. Instead he can only make a strangled cry that is muffled by the fabric of Lance’s jacket.

“Its okay. It’s okay.” Lance murmurs into Keith’s hair. He runs his hand up and down his back, fingers grazing the worn fabric of his bright red jacket. He lets the boy wear himself out, releasing years of pent up emotions into the crook of his neck. 

Once Keith’s shoulders stop shaking and his breath begins to even out, Lance smooths out the top of his dark hair and plants a kiss, whispering, “You mean so much to me, too.” He feels the other boy chuckle weakly beneath him.

“We’re so stupid, aren’t we?” Keith asks, tilting his head up to meet Lance’s deep eyes with a grin. 

“It’s not our fault there’s not an ounce of self preservation between the two of us.” Keith chuckles at that, letting his head fall back onto Lance’s chest and wrapping his arms a little tighter around his waist. Lance feels his heart tighten. He drops his head on top of the pile of raven hair beneath him and sighs. “I’m sorry.” He can feel Keith shift beneath him, humming in question. “I’m sorry I didn’t tell you about dying. And I’m sorry I didn’t try harder to get you to stay.” At that, Keith shoots his head up, knocking into Lance’s jaw in the process. “Ow,” Lance says jokingly.

“Don’t say that.” Keith says, expression turning serious. “I left because I was an idiot. Not because of you. Or anyone else.” Lance narrows his eyes before leaning forward to rest his forehead against Keith’s. 

“But we just let you leave. Even though you didn’t seem happy. We should’ve seen that.” Keith sighs. 

“I… I don’t know, Lance. We’re just going to keep going around in circles talking about this.” He pauses for a moment, opening his eyes to take in the beauty of Lance’s face this close to his own. “I don’t want to talk about this anymore.” Lance opens his own eyes, and Jesus, Keith was never going to get used to that shock of blue so close to his own. Lance nods, or at least nods as best as he could with his forehead still pressed against Keith’s. 

“I like you” He says quietly, and Keith smiles.

“Is that so?”

“Shuddup” Lance mumbles, no real heat behind the words, and lets his eyes flutter shut. “Yes. I like you a lot.” His face flushes red against his tan skin. Keith could almost cry again just looking at the beauty in front of him.

“I want to kiss you.” He murmurs. A smile creeps onto Lance’s face. 

“Then kiss me.”

 


End file.
